I know a ditty nutty as a fruitcake, goofy as a goon and silly as a loon! Some call it pretty, others call it crazy, but they all sing this tune. . . Drake/Hoffman/Livingston, 1943 What tune are they talking about? Well, there are plenty to choose from. Maybe its: Does Your Chewing Gum Lose Its Flavor On The Bedpost Over Night? Or. . . How Could Red Riding Hood Have Been So Very Good (And Still Kept the Wolf From the Door?) Or even. . . Yes! We Have No Bananas! (Written in 1923 as a takeoff on the calls of fruit sellers, this ones still a hit after 100 years.) Whatever the answer (and well get to that in a bit), one things for certain. That tune is part of a time-honored tradition: the novelty or nonsense song. The titles are silly. The melodies and lyrics are sillier. But just try and get these little earwigs out of your head. Once ensconced, theyre invincible. Novelty songs had their first heyday in the British music halls and on the American Vaudeville stages of the early 20th century. Leather-lunged showfolk like Al Jolson and Sophie Tucker belted out (no mics back then) rousers like Where Did Robinson Crusoe Go (with Friday on Saturday Night?) and Youve Got to See Mama Evry Night (or You Cant See Mama at All). In those pre-readily-available-recording days, crowds snatched up sheet music copies boasting colorful covers by the boxful, trying out the tunes on their home pianos. For those with no musical ear, player pianos did the trick: just pop on the roll and the player did all the work, while you did your best to warble along. The appeal of novelty songs waxed and waned over the years, but tough times always seemed to bring them back to the forefront. During WWI, a popular Irving Berlin number had an optimistic miss viewing her soldier fella marching off to battle on the wrong foot, insisting They Were All Out of Step But Jim. World War II brought even more novelties, as a chuckle went a long way toward relieving stress, tedium, and uncertainty both on the homefront and overseas. Whether clever or corny, 1940s novelty tunes were guaranteed day-brighteners. Those irrepressible songsters, the Andrews Sisters, were particularly successful in churning out novelty after novelty, from the jiving Scrub Me Mama With a Boogie Beat to the hillbilly anthem, I Didnt Know the Gun Was Loaded. Other WWII novelties poked barbed fun at the enemy (Der Fuehrers Face, introduced by none other than Donald Duck). Some saluted war workers (Rosie The Riveter, complete with a riveting brrr). The Machine Gun Bounce even made use of pretty much unsingable vocal ack-acks, imitating the sound of a machine gun in action. And on the subject of nonsense syllables.... Mairzy Doats and Dozy Doats and liddle lamzy divey, a kiddley divey toowouldnt you? Thats the chorus of 1943s Mairzy Doats, which follows the verse that opened this essay. But what does it mean? More to come.... As the 1950s and 60s rolled on, so did the novelty tunes, which were now right at home on records and radio: (How Much Is) That Doggie in the Window?; Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini; Monster Mash; The Purple People Eater. With their colorful covers (and rock-bottom prices, still just a dollar or so per copy), novelty songs from the early 1900s, right up through the Weird Al Yancovic parodies of today, continue to lift spirits (and ricochet around in your brain). Even when times get testy. . . even when the lyrics seem incomprehensible. Speaking of which, heres a translation: Mares eat oats and does eat oats and little lambs eat ivy, A kidll eat ivy too Wouldnt you? Well, I dont know. Id have to be pretty doggone hungry. Photo Associate: Hank Kuhlmann. Photos by Donald-Brian Johnson. Donald-Brian Johnson is the co-author of numerous Schiffer books on design and collectibles, including Postwar Pop, a collection of his columns. His favorite novelty tune is still that WWI chestnut, Would You Rather Be a Colonel with an Eagle on Your Shoulder or a Private with a Chicken On Your Knee? Please address inquiries to: donaldbrian@msn.com.